It's all in the attitude.

So this morning I was reflecting a little on my birthday in the rare moments of peace and quiet I am afforded, and I have come to the conclusion that it was probably one of the better birthdays of my adult life. Maybe even the best one ever. And I have come to the conclusion that it may be because of three things -- 1. I went into my birthday with no real expectations, for as long as I can remember I wanted my birthday to be special, and I did everything I could to make it so. But it always ended up feeling like I was the only one who really thought it was a big deal. And 2. Because I am older, and wiser, and I have learned what really counts. And finally 3. I have some really fabulous, genuine, caring friends this year.



Because really -- the day didn't go so well from a factual standpoint. Luke woke up vomiting, and for some reason Comcast decided to disconnect my service -- despite the fact they they were paid earlier in the week. (They turned it right back on when I called and apologized but still....) I don't get presents, and we decided we couldn't really afford to go out either because we have quite a few extra expenses right now.



But what I did receive was a lot of recognition. In years past I am lucky if my own kids remember to tell me happy birthday. Not only did three of the four kids do so this year -- but it seems like everyone else did too. I can't tell you how many friends took the time to wish me happy birthday this year, either on facebook, or an email, a phone call, or remembering in the hustle and bustle of the dance studio or the Y. My mom even called late last night from Florida, which I wasn't really expecting. And as we get older I think we all start to realize just how invaluable feeling recognized can be.

I even felt confident enough (finally!) at my "age" to not be ashamed at all to pick up my own bouquet of flowers at the grocery store yesterday afternoon -- I deserved it, it was my birthday!

So last night I went to bed feeling good about my age, my birthday, feeling good about me, because I felt loved and important. And for that I thank you all!



The only thing that could have topped yesterday's sense of importance happened this morning. Teague asked me to put on Curious Buddies for him and while I was taking him upstairs we talk and I asked "who's my baby boy?" And he laughed and usually I will say "is it Luke? is it Molly?" until we get to Teague, but today he just said "I ruv it."



And I said "what?"



"I ruv it." and Teague grins.



""You ruv it?"



And then it happened -- Teague hugged me and said "I ruv it." Oh. I got it now. "I love it." And by "it" he meant me.

Overheard this morning.....

"Ssh... guys... it's mommy's birthday."
"No it isn't, it's tomorrow."
"Gosh (siblings name) it IS tomorrow."
"Really?"
"Yes, really!"
"We should get her a present.. like a duck."
"We can't "re-ford" a duck, or a trampoline." (???)
"How old is she?"
"I don't know.. like probably 100 or 18 or something."

:)

A few thoughts on blessings.

Last night I watched the episode of the Duggar show -- 18 kids and counting. In this episode they brought home their newest daughter from the hospital. (If you are unfamiliar with the Duggars they are a conservative family from Arkansas who have 18 biological children from age well, newborn to I think like 21 or something in that vicinity.)

I found as I watched the episode that not only was I struck by their sincere happiness and joyfulness in all they do (as I usually am, it's one of the reasons I like to watch) but by how excited every one of them was at the birth of little Jordyn-Grace. You would have thought it was their first. And that got me thinking about how many adults I know react to the blessings not only in their own lives but in other people's.

Now I am not speaking just about having children, although that is a good example, but generally are we happy and genuinely joyful for our friends and family when they make a decision to ask for or accept a blessing WE don't agree with? Do we instead express our own bitterness to them, do we simply forget to acknowledge it at all? Do we counsel against it when we aren't asked? Or do we go at it half heatedly? "well it's a blessing but....." Who asked us for our "but..." ?

Sure I don't always agree with those around me are doing -- but unless it is going to seriously hurt somebody it isn't my duty as a friend (or relative) to agree with it. It's not my place to be "nervous" about it, or judge it. It's my job to be joyful about it if they are.

I guess I am on my soapbox today because in the last three weeks I have had three newly pregnant friends. Two of them have actually stated that they are "afraid" to tell their extended families and friends. How sad is that? These are grown, married women. But they are afraid of the lack luster response they are going to garnish because it's their 2nd, or 3rd child, or 4th child. How is it that this family can be not only accepting, but joyful, and excited for the birth of the 18th child, but most of society looks at anything beyond 2 as a cause for "concern"? Especially in somebody else's family?

If YOU wouldn't have a particular choice, that's great. Don't do it. But do everyone a favor and try not to judge the decisions that others make -- I am sure if they want to know how you really feel about something they'll ask. Otherwise keep your thoughts quiet -- I am sure they will appreciate it.

Okay -- vent over :) I will step off my soap box for a while now.

Chilidog Bacon Cheeseburgers

So I made this commitment to post to the blog everyday but -- wow! Tuesdays are crazy busy sometimes. It's a full day on a "normal" week which means that if anything goes different, a doctor's appt., someone is sick, school goes slowly, it makes for a crazy day. So today, let's just say -- a number of those things went wrong. :)

I didn't want to skip out though, so this is a recipe we eat as often as the little pirates can convince me too -- it is actually REALLY good albeit terribly unhealthy I am sure. :) But hey when the choice is walk the plank or eat them...... lol

Childog Burgers
(I try to cheat the healthy factor and at the suggestion of Rachel Ray serve this with veggie sticks and dip!)

8 slices of bacon (turkey bacon works too just whatever you usually buy)
1 pound of ground beef
2 beef or pork hot dogs, diced
2 tablespoons chili powder
1 table spoon grill seasoning (I use Montreal steak seasoning but anything you use will work- even salt and pepper)
2 teaspoons Worcestershire sauce
2 table spoons ketchup
1 teaspoon hot sauce
Sliced Cheddar or Colby cheese
2 tablespoons butter
1/2 cup chili sauce
Buns

1. Cook the bacon and set aside.
2. Mix the beef with the diced hot dogs, the chili powder, grill seasoning, Worcestershire, kethcup, and hot sauce. Form 4 large patties -- or 2 large and 4 small patties, or whatever.;)
3. Cook the patties in a drizzle of vegetable oil until cooked through as desired.
4. Top with a slice of cheese, and two slices of bacon, and slather remaining chili sauce on the buns.

I promise I will go for a real entry tomorrow!

A Champion Weekend.

It's Monday, and before I get to feeling to overwhelmed by my day (it may be to late) I am going to take a moment to reflect on a truly wonderful weekend. We have so much to be thankful for this morning, that I simply must not let the laundry list of chores, and errands to do to "catch up" today wear me down.

As many of you know on Saturday we left for Grand Rapids for the state 8 & Under Swim Meet. But before we could leave for that, Samuel had a soccer game at 9:30. (And I had to coach!) It was snowing by the time we got to the Y and by the time we left it was a nightmare. Then we had to pick up all of Molly's girl scout cookies from her troop leader's home in Michigan Center. By this time we were on our way to drop Molly off at her friend's house the roads were impassable. Visibility was about nothing, and they were closing 94 in town by the time we got off at Airport Road and took the back roads up to 127 North. It took us well over an hour to get out of Jackson and we still had a long way to go. It's a good thing I left TONS of extra time, it took us forever to get to Grand Rapids -- but get there we did.

Because there is nothing else to do in a blizzard, Jason and Luke and I went to the Grand Rapids Griffins hockey game Saturday night after checking in with the hotel, etc. (They are the AHL team for the Red Wings) It was a lot of fun, and Luke seemed to enjoy himself. He got tired after the second period so we left early and headed back to the hotel.

Sunday was the big day. The State Championships! Luke seemed not to notice that it was a big deal (which was great!) but I was a nervous wreck. First, let me say that the pool was packed. There were 300 + swimmers involved, all under 8 & Under, and they all had tons of family packed into the stands to watch. Second, there were so many spectators that many had to sit out in the lobby because the stands only held so many squished in like sardines! (Thank you, thank you, thank you Brandi for saving us a seat!) Finally, I will say it was about 90 degrees up there all day. (I think I sweated off ten pounds!)

Then came the big moment. Luke's first swim (He had looked phenomenal in warm ups!) -- from where we sat it appeared he had forgotten his goggles when he went to marshaling and I about died -- what I DID do was sneak down to the pool deck and send a teammate to check on him - insert embarrassed mom shame here! -- he had them the whole time. Phew. And then before I knew it he was up! He swam in the second to last heat, winning his heat with a fabulous time. But being that it wasn't the medal heat (the last one usually) it was hard to see where he ended up place wise. We were thrilled anyway, he had done AWESOME.

Just as we settled in routine again watching other swimmers, they began to announce the final results of the boys 25 freestyle. (They give medals to the top 6 finishers.) "In 6th place representing the Jackson Orcas Youth Swim Team, Lucas Williams, In 5th place...." I about fell out of the stands. He had done it. Out of all those kids, in his first year swimming, Luke had medaled at States. I thought Luke was going to float to the medal area.

As the day went on he ended up medaling again for the 50 free -- this time a 5th place, dropping yet another 7 seconds from the incredible time he posted in districts. In the final two weeks of the season Luke took nearly 16 seconds off of that race alone. He finished tenth in backstroke and swam in a 7th place relay, anchoring it with his fabulous freestyle sprint.

I don't think he has floated back to earth yet.

Prayer Reuest Please.

Jason, Lucas, and I are headed to Grand Rapids tommorow for the state meet and they have blizzard warnings posted.

Busy Plans

Well it's Friday again, only instead of winding down we are definitely winding up in the Williams house. Luke will be swimming in the state meet this weekend (Sunday) so pray for speed, patience, and nerves of steel. (That last one is for mom, Luke doesn't even know the meaning of the word nerves!) Molly has a sleepover planned with a friend on Saturday and is SUPER excited about it, and Samuel and Teague will be staying with grandma. Wish us luck!



I hope all of you have a great weekend as well -- get some rest for me! And I am adding on Luke's birthday montage - enjoy it, he has grown up so much in the last few years.

8 years is a long time.

It's hard to believe that 8 years can go so quickly. Harder still to believe that 8 years have gone by since Luke was a baby. Heck, I was still just a baby myself then (or at least it sure feels that way looking back.)

After months of a miserably, sick, uncomfortable pregnancy Lucas Alex Williams came into the world on February 19, 2001. He had been due on my birthday, a week later. And even though I wasn't fully yet a Christian, I can say with all assurance, that I was never more certain of the existence of God as I was the moment I laid eyes on Lucas. And I have had similar experiences when I first saw all the kids, but none came close to being as powerful as I felt God's presence that night. There was no way that I had done anything that perfect.

Lucas has taught me many lessons over the years, many he is STILL teaching me, but I know that very first one, the mere existence of God will be the most important. He has not always been the easiest child. I often joke that had we waited until he was 2 or 3 to have Molly he would be an only child. :) But Luke has taught me about patience, about looking for the small victories, about tolerance, and how to laugh. He's a good kid, even if he is a difficult kid. He stretches me in a million ways-- I often find myself telling God "I can't deal with this, I can't cope with this, I can't manage this -- and I don't want to!" But God uses Luke to prove to me that with Him I can do it, and not just because I have to, but because I love Luke and I really do want to.

Happy 8th Birthday Lucas!

I will post more thoughts on this tommorow, along with a video montage.

Shameless Brag

Is she cute or what?

A Day Off

I know this is going to sound silly -- but have I mentioned that I have a really great husband these days? Yesterday Jason had the day off for Presidents Day. And guess what? I got to take the day off myself! I am battling this ridiculous sinus infection so not only did Jason take the little boys to the grocery store with him so I could rest they brought me these:

And then Samuel helped Daddy put together our new dining room table. Because well.... let's face it the days of us fitting at a dinette set have been over for a long time! I am looking forward to being able to actually serve food from the table again instead of constantly going back and forth to the kitchen counter.

Commitment.

So I feel like I need to apologize first off for the way the blog was kept up last week. I let myself get to busy to post, to busy to take quiet time for myself, and to busy for a whole host of other things. I promise to do better this week. :)

Commitment is definitely a three syllable word, because commitment is hard. Especially on the days (or weeks) when there is so much going on, it would be easier to "skip" whatever it is. This year I decided to be committed to loving my life for what it is -- a gift from God. And admittedly I have faulted in that of late. Because part of loving my life, is taking care of my life. That means not skipping the laundry, or not continuously skipping making dinner in favor of take out, etc. Part of my life is doing those things to take care of the house and the family -- and if I were truly trying to "love my life" I would do those things joyfully. Don't get me wrong -- I also think part of loving your life is going with the flow and if that means a pizza on a rough day go for it. Just make sure that's what it is. Pizza on a rough day -- not a cop out of doing any part of your responsibilities. ;)

Speaking of Commitment -- it paid off big for Lucas this weekend. We had our final swim meet before the state competition on Sunday. The division cluster championships. In swimming, as much as it is about place, it is also about times. Everyone is always trying to better their best times. Times are important because where you are seated (which heat you swim in, what lane you get, etc...) is based on your best time. Luke took 4.5 seconds off of his best time ever in the 25 free ( that's a lot of time to drop in only one length of the pool) nearly 6 off his best time in the 25 backstroke, and best of all nearly 12 seconds off his best time ever in the 50 freestyle. When he hit the wall for the turn in the 50 free (two lengths) he was at just about 19 seconds. Previous to this meet the fastest he had ever done one length of the pool in a meet was 34 seconds! It looks like all of Luke's commitment is paying off! (And for those of you who don't know -- he is very committed with swimming. He swims 4 days a week, two hours at a time, and on Saturdays.) I hope everyone has a great week!

Mailing Day

So Valentines Day is right around the corner, and I already know what you are thinking. I know most of us loathe Valentines Day, but I actually love it. And no, it's not because I get some outstanding gift every year, I am lucky to get a card. (hint, hint, honey!) I love the idea that there's a day set aside to remind us to tell the people we love, just how much we love them. And besides, as most of you know, I'm a card nut so I love another reason to send a card.

Yes, that's right, I still send cards. Actual folding notes, sent through the USPS, with postage. Don't get me wrong, I love e-mail, I like instant gratification to much not to. But there is something special about actual mail. It excites me, and when it comes to cards I feel like it's the only way to do it. Especially for us grown-ups who are used to getting mail full of bills, bills, and did I mention -- bills! It's an unexpected little surprise to get a card.

So yes, I will be mailing my Valentines today. And yeah -- I have a lot of them. I think I might like sending Valentines Cards even more than I like sending Christmas cards because most people don't expect Valentines. The postal employee is likely to look at me like I nut -- but they should be used to it by now, I frequently go in with a stack of cards to mail. :)

So my challenge today for you -- find a piece of paper, fold it over and write a little note to someone. Put in an envelope, stamp it, and send it out. It will hardly cost you a thing and it could really brighten some one's day.

Spring, like a dash of color in a world of greys.

In a world where we so often focus on what is wrong, what is going wrong, and what could go wrong how lucky are we to have a God who loves us? A God who gave us this crazy, stressed out, busy, chaotic life? A God who turns summer storms into rainbows, and winter chills into snowflakes. Because life is wonderful -- it has to be. What else is there? Maybe I am just feeling light headed because it's February 10th, and it's 60 degrees outside, but today -- it's easy to love my life. And it's not because it's been an easy day, or it promises to become one. Molly is being stubborn with school work, Teague was overtired and cranky at the dance studio, and I couldn't find any black beans that weren't fried already at Walmart and had to go to Kroger too. We still have a jazz class, and a swim lesson, and a swim practice to survive. And yet --- I am choosing to love my life. And when it feels like May in February it's easy to do that. So today I am singing praises of gratefulness.

I am grateful for my kids, who have their own personalities and their own sense of style. (Ask Luke what he wore to school today!)

I am grateful for my daughter who, if nothing else, knows what she wants in life. And isn't afraid to say so. (I put a shirt out for her this weekend that said "Born to Shop" and Molly read it and looked at Jason and I disgusted and said "No! I was born to dance." :) )

I am grateful for my husband, who cares enough about us to call during the day and actually leave a message to ask how we are doing.

I am grateful for the other moms at dance, sometimes it can feel like they are the only friends I see regularly.

I am even grateful for the ones who give Teauge and I the eye when he is screaming, or running. How fortunate they are they have never had to chase a screaming toddler anywhere. ;)

And I am grateful for the sunshine. Even if it does snow this weekend, it reminds me that spring is just around the corner.

Fireproof Review

Last our small group from church got together for pizza and a movie. We were watching Fireproof as it is part of the next study we are going to do. First off, let me say that I was only half looking forward to watching this movie. Bad Christian confession time here -- I don't really like Christian movies. Not that I like un-Christian movies per say --- I don't mind real movies with Christian ideas. But movies that are produced with the intent on being "Christian movies" are not usually my thing. Part of that is my attention span. It takes a REALLY good movie to make me want to sit through the whole thing. Anything longer than 2 hours it better be an EXCEPTIONAL movie. Because it usually only takes me an hour, or less, to figure out exactly how a movie is going to end, and after that I *may* have an hour of sitting still tolerance left. Tops. And getting back to those "made to be Christian" movies, well the acting is terrible, and the plot line -- always predictable.

Yes that's right, I have never seen Facing the Giants in it's entirety.

That said, I really did want to see this one because of all the hype it's been giving in improving marriages, and really who doesn't need help there? I had refused to actually PAY to see it at the theater though.

All in all, yes --- the acting was terrible. Were it not for Kirk Cameron I am not sure it would have been believable enough to get anything out of. (Although really he was very good in the role) But despite feeling slightly embarrassed by the bad acting at times (why I was embarrassed I don't know but I was.) I didn't have any of my usually attention issues -- despite being insanely predictable (duh!) it was very good to watch, as if you were hanging on, not to see the ultimate outcome (cause you figured it out um... before you watched the movie) but to see what each of the steps were to get there. It was a little like watching a very emotional cooking show-- you knew at the end you were going to get a great dessert, you weren't watching for the outcome you were watching to see all the ingredients.

And in actuality it was a good movie, and I really do think any married couple should watch it.

An oldie but a goodie.

I am in the process of going through old cd's of pics and organizing them and couldnt help but share.

This is Luke and Molly at two and three.

This mom thing is hard.

Seriously. Parenting is work. Hard work, and there is often not a clear cut answer. All we can do is count three phases of "accessing" the answer before we give it and hope we do alright. (What do we WANT to say, what do we NEED to say, and what we are going to say) Sometimes there is no time to think it over and something blurts out. Other times you have a little time to mull it over.

Over the last couple of days Jason and I have really had to think about Lucas. If you watch the news at all I am sure you have seen the Michael Phelps news story. (If you haven't he was photographed using marijuana in November, and has apologized. He has been dropped as a sponsor for Kelloggs and now suspended by USA swimming for three months.) And this has left us in a bit of predicament. Luke ADORES Michael Phelps, he has his own sign in his room (which he made) "Biggest Phelps Fan". We have cereal boxes, and posters, and a DVD. We have a coveted Phelps swim cap. It's his hero. So what do you say to a kid who's Superman just got playing with cryptonite?

This posed a two part problem for me. One being that we have never actually talked to Luke about drugs. He doesn't know they exist. He's in the first grade, I figured I had a few years. And to be honest, I don't know that he would get it.

Second, I don't really want to take away his hero. We grow up so fast, and all to soon he will be old enough to know that hero's fall. I felt like for Luke it would be the equivalent of telling the Easter Bunny and Santa weren't real. And yes, he still whole heartily believes.

In the end, we decided to wait. If he asks I will tell him Michael Phelps made a bad choice, and he said he was sorry so we are going to forgive him, but he still has to have a punishment. Which is exactly what we tell Luke when he makes a bad choice.

My randomn information.

So I have:
1. Amanda is not my real name. Neither is Manda but the weird thing is that so few people actually call me by my "real" name anymore I almost forget it IS my name. That's okay though 'cause I hate it. I feel like "that" name is a person I used to be a long time ago, not anymore.
2. I am the girliest person I know, but my favorite movies are Miracle and Glory Road.
3. To the same effect, I can watch just about any sport on TV and enjoy it.
4. My favorite colors are yellow and black -- but not together.
5. I am a Christian, but it took me years of being one to feel like I could really wrap my head around the whole salvation thing. I believed it because I wanted to, but I didn't really get it. Sometimes I still don't.
6. VERY few people know how old I really am, and it's because I let them think I am older than I am.
7. I try to run at least 3 times a week at the Y. I hope to be able to run in actual "races" someday.
8. I have four kids and tell everyone we are done, but I secretly wish I could have like two or three more. (But my body wouldn't like me.)
9. I love green kool aid. :)
10. Despite all my other political leanings I think health care is a basic human right.
11. I don't like pants. If I lived where it was warmer I would wear skirts or dresses everyday.
12. I haven't worked since Molly was a baby, and even though I feel like I should have some kind of career goals, I would be perfectly happy if I never did again. I am already doing what I always wanted -- I'm a mom.
13. My kids are my whole life and I am okay with that.
14. I love the smell of coffee but I hate the taste.
15. I am a law and order junkie.
16. I don't like animals. I would never hurt one, and I don't want them mistreated or anything, but I would personally never want one.
17. I wish I could take an adult dance class but I don't have the nerve.
18. I could easily own over 50 pairs of shoes in a single season.
19. I cried for days when I found out Teague was not a girl, and I no longer feel the least bit guilty about it. I love him to death anyway.
20. I can't stand video games or computer games.
21. I love pierogi's but only the real polish kind.
22. My great grandma died when I was in 2nd grade and I still think about her everyday.
23. I still wear my mom's ring from my dad -- even though their marriage didnt last long enough for me to remember.
24. If my daughter ever wants her hair cut short I will sob.
25. At my age, and at this point in my marriage I am happier and more sure of myself than I have ever been, and it is all because of God.

Call Terminex!

I got up from working on school stuff to find there is a very large rodent in the house!

A boy and his dog.

And Teague isn't the only one who felt that way this week. It seems to have been one of those weeks when we have been bogged down with appointment after appointment. We had four doctor's and evaluation appointments in the last three days alone. But all things considered, we got through them amazingly well intact.

Teague has qualified for physical therapy through the intermediate school district for his legs, which means -- It's FREE! And they will come to the house to do it once per week, rather than us having to pack up and haul out to Ann Arbor once a week. Any of you with more than one child will realize JUST what a blessing this. God is good!

We all also had him fitted for his braces which should be in in just about three weeks. He is not going to be happy with them. He is not going to like them. But with any luck, in 6-9 months they will be a thing of the past, and his legs will be straighter and walking without turning in so much he trips himself . The physical therapists all remarked on how incredibly athletic he is to be able to do all that he does (which is everything!) despite the way his legs are turning at the moment. He lets nothing hold him back.

The kids were so good, and we were all so exhausted that even though we missed church last night, we went to the Olive Garden for dinner. Now, I will be honest, we usually avoid the Olive Garden because well.... it's quiet, and semi-formal in there. And the kids are, well, loud if nothing else. But guess what? Aside from Luke climbing on Teauge's chair to get out from the table, they were really good. And really quiet. And we weren't the only ones to notice. The gentleman the table over stopped by to tell us how good they were on his way out. He told us how he and his wife had had six children, so he knew exactly how hard it was to take them to a restaurant, told us again what a nice family we had and left. Wow. Sometimes God knows exactly when you need some kind of affirmation that all the running, and all the work is really paying off.

Time well spent.

Another weekend has passed and on a bright sunshiny, Groundhog Day, I am told the groundhog did not see his shadow, ushering in an early spring. The funny thing is, as long as the winter as been, as cold and snowy as it has been, I found myself kind of disappointed. All of a sudden it felt like winter just started. And I wasn't ready to relinquish another season of snow angels, and sledding, and hot cocoa. Remember when you were little and it felt like time stood still? Well as a parent that's all you ever want. For time to stand still, for just an instant. Or at least slow down a little.

Our weekend was good, relaxing, refreshing, and uncharacteristically lazy for us. We didn't get much done. Samuel had a soccer game, we went to church, and we watched the Super Bowl. That's about it. And it was grand. It's nice to spend an evening yelling at the TV with your family and pretending that whether or not an athlete touched the ground with both feet or one, are life's biggest problems. :)